Over the past several weeks, I have received many messages from my amazing followers wondering where on Earth I’ve gone. I’m still here (promise), but I admit that this year was my least active year since I began my blog. On both a personal and professional note this has been a difficult year, and I thought I would end the year with a candid post. Some of you privately shared with me your personal and professional difficulties, and it truly helped to know that I am not alone in how I feel. I think this connection even with those whom you may have never met is truly powerful, and it is these honest messages that prompted my last post of 2018.
Several years ago when I started Admirably Legal, I was kicking off my blogging hobby with the theme New Beginnings. At the time, my work-life balance was at level zero, and I was looking for an outlet to share with friends and strangers, whether it be fashion and style tips to travel tales. A lot has happened since I began my blog.
First, I shed a layer of friends who who were negative and vindictive. I shared countless posts at various fashion and lifestyle events, and many friends and acquaintances assumed that I was having the time of my life and was happy. This is one of the dangers or downsides of social media, the perception that we may paint to avoid what is under the surface. The truth of the matter was that I was surrounded by a few women who instead of encouraging one another were selfishly putting each other down and not truly connecting and being open with one another. I realized that this negativity and superficial engagement was not what I needed, so at the end of last year and the beginning of this year I moved on. Removing the negativity was a challenging but important step. However, it was even more difficult as I was beginning a job with a new company and found myself facing some interesting challenges, some of which were not particularly positive in nature. I work as a full time attorney handling multi million dollar engagements, and as I threw myself into my job, I forgot how to enjoy myself. I stayed away from sharing my experience with my good friends because I didn’t want to spread the negativity, and I was beginning to accept that maybe not everyone is meant to truly be content.
Over the Christmas holiday, I started reading with a new sense of vigor and came across a quote that struck a chord with me and brings me full circle to where I was when I began my blog. Chinese philosopher Lao-Tzu wrote, “New beginnings are sometimes disguised as painful endings.” As I reflect on the challenging few years that have passed, I am choosing to believe that this is a painful ending that will take me to a new and positive beginning. I start this new chapter by being open with all of you, and for those of you who may also be facing a difficult time, please feel free to connect with me.
I’m not a big fan of new year’s resolutions, as I think there are unnecessary subconscious pressures that can take over well-intentioned goals. However, I have decided to simply set a goal for a new chapter. My goal can be summarized in one word, strength. I want to become physically stronger by changing up my exercise regime. I want to strengthen my ties within my community, both from a legal peer perspective and from a charitable perspective. Most importantly, I want to develop and strengthen a stronger and more positive self-perception. These goals don’t happen overnight and will take much longer than a year, but by sharing this goal in the blogosphere I start this new journey with all of you.
I wish you all a healthy and happy 2019!
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INSTAGRAM: @admirablylegal & @MiraHaykal